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Telling the real story of my #Twitterbirth

Hello lovelies!

This week has been crazy-bonkers  (a little like how I’ve been described lately by those lovely Daily mail readers!)

Oscar is a week old tomorrow and has had a very exciting first week of life!

From radio interviews to TV shoots, he’s slept through, waking only for his regular feed and deep blue eyed look-around to see if the world is still ticking on by!

So, my #twitterbirth

It’s caused quite a stir in the media world, and not one I was prepared for!

From local papers to radio, to being featured as a competition question – it’s all been a little overwhelming!

I decided to tweet my labour not to ‘dispel birthing myths’ as many newspapers said, and not to ‘promote pain relief free labour’ as others insisted on writing about, but simply to share a positive home- birth experience with those that WANTED to follow.

I didn’t ask the world to get involved (the story reached Japan, Australia and even the New York Times) and I didn’t expect anyone other than Childcare is fun followers to get involved.

However, the media picked up my story and off it flew! Printed (with many errors) in practically every paper and online offering, for people to pull apart to their hearts content (perhaps with no consideration to what they were saying about a mum who had just given birth and was perhaps a little delicate?)

I’m so lucky. I know I am- I want people to know that I know I’m lucky! I loved my home-birth. It was everything I wanted it to be. it was fantastic (yes I’m shouting it out loud and proud!)

From laughing with the midwives and my darling husband (who has been my rock through all of this) to discussing the evenings after – labour tea (I was desperate for fish and chips,) it was a truly positive, empowering experience.

When things got a little tough I’d tweet and there were these amazing tweets full of positivity and kindness, it was fantastic.

Now social networking isnt everyones cup of tea, and that’s fine. If you don’t like it, don’t do it! I didnt ask the world to follow my birth, I decided I would share it, I told my followers I would, and that was that. The response from 1,085 followers was positive, and has been since Oscar was born 6 days ago.

Sadly, there have been a few grump – bags that have decided to poop on my positivity. The cruelest comments are from those who have taken the time to trash my story of positive birthing with negative horror birthing stories – then beating up my character with nasty comments such as ‘freak – put the phone down’ and ‘attention seeker’ and name calling such as ‘tweeting twit’. There are many more that I wont write here as they are too upsetting.

There have been some lovely follow up stories to poop on the nasties, and these are what I focus on.

I’ve also received some lovely messages, well wishes, and gifts for Oscar from the #twitterbirth followers! (Many thanks to Speed communications for their lovely box of Tesco goodies for little man that arrived today!)

So, to set the story straight for those that were a little daft and took EVERYTHING the papers said as the truth…

1. My story wasn’t about being brave – women have babies everyday! It’s not a new thing!

2. It wasn’t about promoting drug free births- I had a homebirth, you can’t have drugs at a homebirth! If you need drugs then have them!! It’s your body, your labour!! My #twitterbirth wasn’t about that. It was about promoting a positive home-birth experience!

3. I’m not the first #twitterbirth, that was in 2007.

4. I wasn’t saying hospitals are for the weak and homebirth is better. I said I LIKE to be at home, I don’t like hospitals, so for me a homebirth was the only choice. My #twitterbirth wasn’t about that. It was about promoting a positive home-birth experience!

5. I’m not the longest labour ever, it was actually a ‘normal’ labour at 14 hours, unlike my mothers labours which were 27, 26, and 32 hours ACTIVE drug free labour. (Yes- she is a hero!) So, you see – My #twitterbirth wasn’t about that. It was about promoting a positive home-birth experience!

6. I’ve had a baby- it’s a big deal to me, my husband and my family because we thought we could never have children and have been blessed with two in one year. To others- it’s no big deal, and I appreciate that, but my #twitterbirth wasn’t about that. It was about promoting a positive home-birth experience (has it sunk in yet?)

7. I’m not a hippy, lentil eating, potato growing, organic only eating, numpty. I’m a mum of two, who runs a fun and informative website, that decided one day to help the hundreds of frightened pregnant women who email me regularly about their fears of childbirth. My #twitterbirth was about that. It was about promoting a positive home-birth experience!

8. There were more than 9 tweets!

My home-birth was wonderful and I’m glad I had the opportunity to share it with you. The majority of feedback has been fantastic, the positive messages have been lovely and so welcoming kept me going this week when the grump bags of media monsters attacked me and my family!

Thanks to all of my lovely childcareisfun_ followers – You were great with your advice and support on the day, and your kind words since have been so lovely.

If you missed the tweets of my #twitterbirth – here are the 9 they published….

And here are all of the tweets……

@Childcareisfun – Tweets 17th September 2010

#twitterbirth here we go lovelies! Contractions started at 230am! Baby decided he wants to come to his sisters 1st b’day party on Saturday! 4:17 AM Sep 17th via Twitterrific

#twitterbirth here we go lovelies! Getting stronger! Me & my hippy no pain relief… Ouch! Could do with a large vodka! 4:35 AM Sep 17th via Twitterrific

@ ShelliBobbins it’s your fault! Labour started 230am … 4:36 AM Sep 17th via Twitterrific in reply to ShelliBobbins

@ EmmaForbes all that baking got baby excited… Am in labour! 4:37 AM Sep 17th via Twitterrific in reply to EmmaForbes

@ julesey10 he’s a comin! 4:37 AM Sep 17th via Twitterrific in reply to julesey10

@ twigs_ am toughin it up! Youchy painful! Doing ok.. Xx #twitterbirth contractions every min… 5:56 AM Sep 17th via Twitterrific in reply to twigs_

#twitterbirth hello lovelies! Hubby thinks I’m mad tweeting but helps in between cons. Will do as long as can. Lots of pain. (Homebirth) 5:57 AM Sep 17th via Twitterrific

@ babybudgeting ah I see! I’m in labour! 5:58 AM Sep 17th via Twitterrific in reply to babybudgeting

#twitterbirth hello lovelies pain taken a step up. Youch. Min long 2-3apart. Mwife coming later. 6:31 AM Sep 17th via Twitterrific

#twitterbirth had bacon butty and paracetemol. Been going (active, regular contractions) since 2.30…. Little man v active! (stop moving little bugger!) 6:32 AM Sep 17th via Twitterrific

#twitterbirth Can somebody pass the vodka. Why do I have to be such a hippy? Homebirth=no pain relief! 6:43 AM Sep 17th via Twitterrific

#twitterbirth oh you lovely lot are sooo lovely you’re making me cry! The support is amazing! Going to meet my baby boy soon!! Mwife on way! 7:00 AM Sep 17th via Twitterrific

#twitterbirth Giving my little betsy who is 1 tomo a cuddle inbetween contractions! Hard but joyful! 7:13 AM Sep 17th via Twitterrific

#twitterbirth contractions slowed down…but still strong My mum& dad been driving full speed from Dorset to get here to look after betsy! 7:26 AM Sep 17th via Twitterrific

#twitterbirth this tweeting inbetween contractions is really helpful but will prob stop at some point when it gets too much… 7:27 AM Sep 17th via Twitterrific

#twitterbirth still going strong peeps…. 8:03 AM Sep 17th via Twitterrific

#twitterbirth thanx to you all~ keep the support coming you lovelies! It’s really helping! No pain relief… Doing well. 8:16 AM Sep 17th via Twitterrific

@burtonrealnappy it is! ((Ouch)) 8:18 AM Sep 17th via Twitterrific in reply to burtonrealnappy

#Twitterbirth #homebirth painful indeedy but coping well… Mwife not coming yet…been going since 230am… 5mins apart still lasting 1min 8:50 AM Sep 17th via Twitterrific

#twitterbirth advice on speeding things along? Am on yoga ball…walking around too… Ideas? 8:51 AM Sep 17th via Twitterrific

#twitterbirth thanx to you all~ keep the support coming you lovelies! It’s really helping! No pain relief… Doing well..#homebirth 8:52 AM Sep 17th via Twitterrific

#twitterbirth #homebirth ~ok folks pain has reached another level… Mwife not here yet… You lovelies are really helping with your tweets 9:37 AM Sep 17th via Twitterrific

#twitterbirth #homebirth contractions closer between now and v painful….resting up for a bit lovelies….need to focus… Back soon! Xx 9:40 AM Sep 17th via Twitterrific

#mwife on way to check how far I’m dialated! Hurty now lots!! 8hrs and counting… Might get into birthing pool soon for relief. 10:21 AM Sep 17th via Twitterrific

#twitterbirth ~ am amazed and so very grateful for your support my lovelies… Let’s hope not too long now.. 10:22 AM Sep 17th via Twitterrific

@ julesey10 am breathing well… Hurts like crazy now. Twitter helps take focus off pain! Amazing! 10:23 AM Sep 17th via Twitterrific in reply to julesey10

@ twigs_ @pearlysmith still going strong ladies… 10:24 AM Sep 17th via Twitterrific in reply to twigs_

#twitterbirth speeding up. Agony. Ouch.  10:56 AM Sep 17th via Twitterrific

#twitterbirth still going my lovelies…. Still no pain relief! V painful now 12:25 PM Sep 17th via Twitterrific

Then my darling hubster @richiestone took over…

Fi (@childcareisfun_)really appreciates all the good luck tweets and messages #twitterbirth

We’re nearly 13 hours in and no baby yet! Definitely at the business end now though! @Childcareisfun_ #twitterbirth

Yes, I know…He managed 2 tweets!

And finally back to me…

#twitterbirth Introducing Oscar John Michael Victor Stone, 7.9 born at 3.42pm at home I’m shattered and sore but the happiest mummy on the planet! http://yfrog.com/n4ufzsj 5:44 PM Sep 17th via Twitterrific

After that, my mum and dad, my in-laws and my beautiful daughter all came to meet and  cuddle Oscar.

I ignored the constant phonecalls and emails from newspapers and radio stations and we had fish and chips for tea and an early night.

 

23 Comments

  • Nikki

    Fi you are so so so amazing and people should just bugger off, if they don’t like it they didn’t have to read it. There is always someone out their that has to spoil it so frustrating. I think what you did was awsome and you have inspired lots of people out there, with you positive home birth. Congratulations lovely lady you have a perfect family.

  • (mostly) yummy mummy

    I think you were amazing! I for one loved following your #twitterbirth and good for you for promoting a positive homebirth experience!
    I am honestly shocked at the horrid comments and I hope you don’t take any notice. You had an amazing homebirth experience and I loved being able to ‘share’ that with you through Twitter x

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  • Jo @ bestbabyshower

    Good on you hun – so it’s not what everyone would do – so what! life would be boring if we were all the same. It obviously helped you get through the labour and that’s all that counts. Have no idea why people would trash it and write such horrid things – bet they wouldn’t say them to your face if they were there. I remember checking emails and answering calls during my 2nd labour! it was something to try and take my mind of things. And good for you for trying to show a positive home birth – I too had a home birth for my second child and I can’t speak highly enough of the experience. Good on you x

  • Claire

    Stuff the Daily Mail, they’re all women-haters anyway! Good job you’re married that’s all I can say, did you see what they wrote about Ed Milliband yesterday?! You and your baby look amazing, I’d never have found your blog if it hadn’t been for all the furore so all publicity is good publicity. Massive congrats on all counts xxx

  • New Mummy

    I love that you tweeted the birth, if I have another baby I’m so tweeting it. I wish people would stop judging and get on with their own lives. Lets face it the Daily Fail is not worth worrying about they talk crap most of the time.

  • Angela Smith

    It was such a priviledge to share those moments with you. I wish you and your lovely family all the very best x

  • Sue

    I thought you were amazing! Sometimes we need to hear something positive and you certainly achieved that tweeting about your birth.

  • Rosaleen

    Wonderful you – and gorgeous little man! Its just that your tweeting was new to people – and it made good copy to rubbish you – small minded people with small lives. I just wanted to tell you that I was a home birth baby – my mother had had an awful time in hospital on her first and I was her third so she was strong enough by then to stand up to the crowd!! When I was growing up and even now people who found out thought they could pass nasty comments (like they were hoping they could get rid of you quietly and you weren’t important enough to merit a trip to the hospital). Unbelievable nastiness! As there still is today for anyone who doesn’t conform. You twitter on away – its just because they are scared!!! I am so proud of my mom and so glad that my arrival hours were so precious with my mother and grandmother. Due to complications both my children were born in hospital and I am glad the hospital service was there.

  • Chris

    I just want to say that I think you did a fantastic thing here.

    My wife was petrified of labour with our first and your tweeting really put her at ease.

  • Jacquie

    Loved it! Wish I was there for the live feed, sadly, I was too pregnant to tweet, but I now know different ;-) x

  • Miss jacq

    Wow Fi, I got quite emotional reading that.I wasn’t on twitter back in September therefore missed it all.I think you are truly amazing for what you did and doing it for you.Good on you. As for the haters …. It beggars belief to be honest but unfortunately twitter does have a few sick And twisted idiots just setting up accounts to abuse people. Thanks for sharing this post I’m so pleased I was able to read it.the picture is beautiful. Now get those lentils soaked ready for your dinner! ;)

    • Fi

      Thank You! Actually it wasn’t anybody on twitter at all- it was journo’s and a few harsh mothers at the daily fail!

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  • Shelley

    It’s all about choices, where to have your baby, who to follow on Twitter and what to believe. Well done Fi for making your choices and standing proud by them. Hope you and the family are all beaming from ear to ear xxxx

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