This time last year I was 24 years old and 20(ish) weeks pregnant, but I wasn’t your average first time mummy with a nice, petit, just about showing little bump.
When I would tell people that I was only 20 weeks I imagined they thought I had got my dates wrong by about 10 weeks or that I was in fact carrying a small elephant. Why? Because I wasn’t carrying just one little bundle of joy, I was carrying three!
My not so little bundles are now nine month old, crawling, lively little boys who are my absolute world. Lucas, Harry and Oscar were born on 19th December 2011 at 34 weeks weighing 4lb 14, 5lb 3 and 4lb 12 respectively. We had a complication free pregnancy and the boys only spent a couple of weeks in special care, which was huge relief given some of the horror stories that our consultant had shared with us at our 13 week scan.
It seemed that we weren’t just being bombarded with negative comments surrounding our complicated pregnancy we were also subject to it from work colleagues, strangers and friends. “I thought one was bad enough”, “how will you cope?” and “I don’t envy you” were just some of the delightful comments that we endured on a daily basis.
Anyway, now that the boys are nine months old, I like to think that we have shown that although they may be physcially more demanding, having triplets is definitely three times the fun. I could just melt when they all laugh together or they all get excited to see me in the morning when I open their bedroom blind. They fascinate and entertain me on a daily basis and now that I am not going to work I get to enjoy them every single day. Don’t get me wrong, sometimes it has been very tough, but on the whole I think that we have adapted to looking after three little people really quite well. “Routine, routine, routine”…this is the phrase that all of the other multiple mummies had drummed into me before I had the boys. This was our saving grace. I couldn’t quite appreciate the importance of it until we brought all three babies home.
The babies left the hospital on a four hourly feeding schedule and we stuck to it rigidly. We would wake them to feed if necessary and feed all of them together or one after the other. If we didn’t wake them, I have no doubt that they would have slept for twelve hours at a time as being premature meant that they slept a lot more than a full term baby. We were acutely aware of how important it was to ensure that they fed six times over a 24 hour period to ensure they put on weight and didn’t become dehydrated.
Looking back I think that the feeding was quite exhausting, but like any parents with newborns, you just do what you have to do. You don’t question it or think ‘I think I’ll have a day off today’ you just do what needs to be done. Hence, I think those first few months are still a little bit of a blur for us. John (my other half) is wonderfully hands on (not that he has a choice!) and we have supported each other throughout our triplet experience ever since our shocking 12 week scan. We would do the 6:30am feed together, I would do the 10:30am and 2:30pm on my own, we would do the 6:30pm together and he would do the 10:30pm on his own so that I could get some sleep in order to do the 2:30am by myself during the working week.
Sometimes I think that it felt a bit relentless, but to be honest we were just pleased that we had kept everyone alive for another day! As the boys started to get bigger they began to drop feeds, there was less sterilising, more sleep and more time between feeds which made everything so much easier.
Our routine has changed a lot over the last nine months, but to give you an idea of the routine that we currently have I thought that I would keep a little diary of a typical day in our house:
6:30 – The babies decide that despite my protests it is definitely time to get up and play. We get them up, change bums and get their bottles ready.
(They get through about 5-6 nappies each on a good day, however thanks to the delights of teething we are currently getting through around 8-10 each per day!)
7am – We put them in their bean bags where they can drink their bottles whilst watching baby tv. One of us will keep an eye on proceedings whilst the other will make our breakfast. They then have a play before breakfast.
8am – telly off and it’s time for the boys to have some mashed banana and porridge.
(We feed them with one bowl and one spoon like a little conveyor belt)
9am – I pack them up in the pushchair, and they are so tired they have a snooze in the hallway. This gives me the chance to quickly get showered and dressed and slap on a bit of make-up.
10am – we do the 10 minute walk to the surestart centre thinking that the ‘story sacks’ session is on and it turns out that I read the timetable wrong and have gatecrashed a childminders session instead…ooops. Of course they still welcome us anyway and the babies play with the older children and some toy cars whilst I have a chat to a mum with 4 week old twins.
11am – we head home and the babies play in various containment devices whilst I get lunch ready.
11:30am – Lunch is served. We all have cheesy scrambled eggs with toast and then banana and apple for dessert.
12:30pm – Nap time!
1:45pm – I get the boys up I end up driving them down to the sure start centre as the playgroup started at 1pm. This is a new group and it’s very welcoming, but I am concerned that the boys will be trodden on by the 4-5 year olds whilst trying to explore. It’s lovely to meet up with mummies that I know, but I’m not sure I will come to this group again until the boys are walking.
3:15 pm – we head home and they have some little Ella’s Kitchen cookies to snack on whilst I have a hot cup of tea. We then have a play together until dinner time at 4:45pm.
4:45pm – For dinner they have chicken and roast vegetables with a splash of baby gravy. I let them feed themselves now as they fight me off if I come near them with a spoon. For dessert they have mango chunks and some natural yoghurt.
5:30pm – They all have nappy rash so I let them roam around with their peachy little bums out until Daddy gets home in time for the bedtime routine to begin. This is a messy business, but thankfully there is nothing worse than a bit of wee to clean up today.
6pm – John arrives home and between us we get them bathed.
6:30pm – Bottle time.
7pm – John will read them a story in bed whilst I start the big clean up and get the dinner on.
8pm – John and I finally get to sit down, eat our dinner and catch up with each other!
By the end of the day I am shattered! I have also managed to squeeze in the hoovering, 3 wash loads and just general cleaning. I then spend the evening making an advent calendar for Christmas as sewing is something that I love to do, whilst John does his freelance design work.
I like that we can now be much more flexible with our daily routine and if we are a little late for lunch or dinner then nobody minds and if the boys want to drop a nap then we just restructure the routine accordingly. We are very lucky as our family will sometimes pop over to assist with dinner time (our most chaotic time of the day) or they will have them to stay over night so that John and I can have some time to ourselves. Sometimes on our precious night off we will have ‘date night’, other times we will be asleep in bed by 8:30pm (rock ‘n’ roll!).
As you can see from the routine above we try to get out of the house at least once a day, but it wasn’t easy at first. It took a lot of confidence to take the babies out when they were small and people thought that I was insane even contemplating venturing outside, even with a helping hand. It was difficult wrestling the buggy in and out of the car and I would get stopped by people wherever we went and having to find a suitable place to bottle feed and change all three babies. I had to really psych myself up to do it, even if I didn’t want to I knew that I had to in order to make things easier for me in the future. The more I took them out, the more confident I felt. I was taking them out on my own, loading and unloading the pushchair, enjoying the positive comments and ignoring the ridiculous ones. When I was on my own I would only take the boys to places that I knew I could navigate the buggy and feed them. I still do, but we now I have taken them to so many places I am not so limited on choice.
As the boys are getting older, moving independently, interacting with each other and sleeping through the night I think that certain aspects have become easier. I am slightly worried that I may turn into a hermit when they begin the walking process as I can’t imagine running around trying to catch three babies across a busy play group, however I may just persevere and accept that I will be spending a lot of time in A&E. That’s what childhood is all about….right?
I don’t think I would be as confident at taking them out if it wasn’t for the help and encouragement of my friends and family. I was lucky enough to have made some good friends through the antenatal classes at my local doctors surgery and four days after bringing the boys home we were visiting each other’s houses for coffee. Amazingly, there was also a twin mummy in the group whose babies are just ten weeks older than my trio and she has played a vital part in helping me retain my sanity over the past nine months. As a multiple mummy, you are drawn to other mums of multiples. You have that special connection and understanding that mum’s of singletons no matter how hard they try will never quite understand or appreciate.
Friends are incredibly important, they can support, reassure and guide you through some of those darker days of being a new mummy as well as share in the delight when things are going well (we like to call these ‘proud mummy moments’). Amongst my friends I am not ‘The triplet mummy’, I am Kim. I have three boys, who all happen to be born on the same day, I enjoy blogging, sewing, music, comedy shows and the odd glass of wine…welcome to my world!
Many thanks to Kim for sharing her wonderful parenting adventure! you can follow Kim’s blog over at Triplets UK!
November 29, 2012
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