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Children starting school still in nappies!
Several newspapers today reported that many children are still in nappies when they start school.
According to the Telegraph today, some schools and nurseries are refusing to take children who are still in nappies but councils now advise that they could be contravening the Disability Discrimination Act by doing so.
Many teachers believe the delay in toilet training is because some parents have made it a low priority because they are too busy, while others have a more relaxed attitude and are happy to ‘wait until the child is ready.’
As a professional and as a mum, I have to say I’ve always toilet trained children (including my own) when they were ready and not according to age. My daughter (2 years 5 months) was trained just before her 2nd birthday because she showed signs of being ready. At almost 2 1/2 she is dry and has only had a few accidents in the early days of training.
Parenting guidelines suggest toilet training should start between 2 and 3 years old, but I have often had children in my care that have struggled up to age 4.
I feel it often isn’t an issue of lazy parenting that the papers seem to have pointed out (although in some cases I think it possibly could be) but more a lack of information, a lack of understanding when a child is ready to use the toilet, and often an underlying medical problem.
In our changing society where baby and child led approach is common practice, it is no surprise that social development is developed later in life than in previous years when children were encouraged to develop according to child development ‘norms’ rather than individuality.
I receive over 150 emails to the FREE parenting service on my website and many of these weekly questions include toilet training nightmares.
These ‘nightmares’ cause parents and children so much distress and worry, but I’m happy to say that my advice on waiting until their child is ready together with my ‘Top Ten Tips to Happy Toilet tots’ help parents struggling with toilet training ease the transition from nappy to toilet.
As with all things parenting – Raising your child should be in a way that makes you and your child happy and healthy.
You can read my Top Ten Tips for Happy toilet Tots here.
Read more about this story in the media here:
Pupils still start school in nappies… Telegraph 7th Feb 2012
Scandal of Britain’s lazy parents: How children are starting school in nappies… Daily mail 7th Feb 2012
6 Comments (Leave a Reply)
I think ur so right! I’ve tried all ur tips with Caleb and had him in fabulous smurf pants he chose and he was having 10+ accidents a day for 3 days. I can push him as much as I can but I just don’t think he’s ready and I won’t have my little one howling the house down non stop and up through the night upset because he’s so disturbed! Giving it 2 more weeks and trying again. X
Thanks for your comment! So true and I can’t stress it enough- if they’re not ready, they’re not ready!
Sometimes they’re ready at 2 sometimes 3 and sometimes a little later! As long as they’re happy that’s all that really matters!
I always advise to try and if it’s really not working to stop, wait a few weeks and try again.
Good luck! Always here and happy to help.
We completely agree here at DLM, we think that pull up nappies make it so much harder for kids to recognise their own bodies cues for the loo they are expensive and parents buy them believing they will help toilet train. The articles raise an interesting point but so typical to blame parents such a cheap shot and missing the point. Parenting is high pressure and many modern mums fee l they are falling short ( even though they are not) if I was still potty training and read today’s articles I would feel more rubbish than ever! We like your blog x x
Thanks! Totally agree with your comments!
I guess that disposables don’t help as children don’t feel wet very often but you’re right, they are all different. My son was nearly 3 when we trained him and at first, he only went nappy free at nursery. Once he’d cracked that, we went for it full time. He was pretty good from that point. However, he wasn’t dry at night for ages – it was September 2010 when we started and that was because he forgot to put a pull up on when he went to bed and realised he could do it, but that still took about one accident per week for a while but he was dry at night by the age of 6. Missy, on the other hand was completely different. One day, she put a pair of pants on and was really good so we tried her. She had a few accidents daily for about a week then realised what she had to do and she was much much better. She was dry at night before she was 3 and again, that was a kind of accident (I suspect she could have gone nappyfree at night earlier but she was probably weeing into it in the morning when she got up). Anyway, I went out one night, OH put the kids to bed and realised we only had one nappy in the house. Trusting her over him, he told her she’d have to go without a nappy and she rose to the occasion. She has only had 3 night time accidents and I suspect 2 of them, she might have had an infection.
Dry at night before 3 is pretty amazing! Wow!
My little girl was trained early just before 2, however she’s such a deep sleeper it’ll be a very long time before she’s dry at night.
When she’s ready-she’ll let me know.